Tomorrow is a new month. February has sucked. Today was no exception. An audit, another binge and no gym again. I worked 13 hours, and started it all an hour in by hitting Walmart that shares the parking lot to eat mini donuts, a box of Glosette raisins, and a pack of gummy bears.
Fan-fucking-tastic.
Snowed like an SOB today. It was a glorious -3C this weekend. -24C today, and by morning -35C. Thanks Mother Nature. Just was I was starting to get excited about spring.
But tomorrow is a new month, a new store and a chance to begin agian. I can go to work tomorrow, skip the sugar binges, eat my lunch, go to the gym, work out, hit the store and pick up celery and prunes, maybe a small treat, and come home to starve or have veggies.
I was 147.2 this morning, I'm hoping for 146.5 by morning but I'm not sure I can hit that. It's Monday, giving me 5 days to drop at least 5lbs. If I stick to being smart I can get down there.
I will posts March's goals tomorrow, but I've got ideas. Enough of this bull shit. Winter is almost over (I hope) it's time to get serious again!
Monday, February 28, 2011
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Bye Bye Weekend
And what a glorious weekend you were. Yes, I gained a MASSIVE amount of weight, and I failed at my attempt to do GMO free for six weeks, but I got to go out with friends (despite there's now video evidence of me singing 'Wannabe'. Yup, fauxhawk and all....) make a new friend, sleep late twice in a row, watch movies, eat pizza, cake, bread and have a diet Dr. Pepper.
Today I didn't quite do my fast. I ate two pieces of toast from the bread I made on Saturday. I'm not sure about that bread as it wasn't quite sweet enough to be a desert bread, and not quite plain enough to be a dinner bread. Don't think I'll be making that one again. I then managed nothing until I was halfway through my drive north and I ate a bunch of gummy candy. Once up here I had a tiny cinnamon bun my friend made and I didn't have the heart to say no. She was just so eager to feed me one now I"m off my GMO free kick. I did end up eating a handful of plain cheerios, and 2 hershey kisses also, but while I was 149.6lbs this morning (EGAD!!!!) I'm 147.7 right now as I drink my reduced sugar hot chocolate.
Tomorrow is the last day at the store I've been at all month and I'm really quite sad to leave. I loved the GM, and the other members of the mgmt team were just as awesome. However, I'm excited to work with my new GM, a chick too!!!! We'll kick some ass and take some names!
I'm on an earlier shift so I will have plenty of time to hit the gym. Hoping I can do a leg day. Zumba is at 6 I believe, so do legs after and be home by 830 or so, or legs before and head out at 7pm.... See how things go down in reality!
I have to hit a grocery store though. I need celery, hot chocolate and something else I forgot.... If I have enough money. I'm kinda super broke this week.
Ugh, I hate early mornings, and tomorrow I have to be up by 5:45am. That's in 6 hrs.
Bah.
Wander: Thank you. You are so right. Cheat days are allowed and I can and will get back on track. You are doing fantastic and while we've both done the stupid binge cycle the past few months you've cracked it. I will now do the same :)
Today I didn't quite do my fast. I ate two pieces of toast from the bread I made on Saturday. I'm not sure about that bread as it wasn't quite sweet enough to be a desert bread, and not quite plain enough to be a dinner bread. Don't think I'll be making that one again. I then managed nothing until I was halfway through my drive north and I ate a bunch of gummy candy. Once up here I had a tiny cinnamon bun my friend made and I didn't have the heart to say no. She was just so eager to feed me one now I"m off my GMO free kick. I did end up eating a handful of plain cheerios, and 2 hershey kisses also, but while I was 149.6lbs this morning (EGAD!!!!) I'm 147.7 right now as I drink my reduced sugar hot chocolate.
Tomorrow is the last day at the store I've been at all month and I'm really quite sad to leave. I loved the GM, and the other members of the mgmt team were just as awesome. However, I'm excited to work with my new GM, a chick too!!!! We'll kick some ass and take some names!
I'm on an earlier shift so I will have plenty of time to hit the gym. Hoping I can do a leg day. Zumba is at 6 I believe, so do legs after and be home by 830 or so, or legs before and head out at 7pm.... See how things go down in reality!
I have to hit a grocery store though. I need celery, hot chocolate and something else I forgot.... If I have enough money. I'm kinda super broke this week.
Ugh, I hate early mornings, and tomorrow I have to be up by 5:45am. That's in 6 hrs.
Bah.
Wander: Thank you. You are so right. Cheat days are allowed and I can and will get back on track. You are doing fantastic and while we've both done the stupid binge cycle the past few months you've cracked it. I will now do the same :)
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Day Off
I'm taking a day off. I know what my weight is but I'm not posting it. I know what I was supposed to eat, but I'm not doing that. I know I was planning on going to the gym, but fuck it, I'm taking today off.
Some of that has to do with the fact I woke up feeling a tiny bit short of breath. I'm hoping that this cold doesn't go to my chest as I'm well and truly fucked for the gym this week if it does. I'm not coughing, just feeling short of breath. Honey and lemon with hot water, vitamins, tea and maybe some Dayquil. As much as I hate to, maybe it will be just enough to get rid of the cold heading to my chest.
That's it for that. I made sugar cookies, and ate a ton. I'm making bread right now, and as soon as it's cooled I'm having a few slices. Yummy!!!! I drive tonight and I'm eating pizza. Double yummy!!! I haven't had CHEESE in so long!!!! I'm going to have diet soda, and depending on how much I make tonight, maybe go have a piece of chocolate cake or something sweet and baked delicious badness.
It's my day off. I want to enjoy it guilt free. I'll let the guilt drive me tomorrow.
Some of that has to do with the fact I woke up feeling a tiny bit short of breath. I'm hoping that this cold doesn't go to my chest as I'm well and truly fucked for the gym this week if it does. I'm not coughing, just feeling short of breath. Honey and lemon with hot water, vitamins, tea and maybe some Dayquil. As much as I hate to, maybe it will be just enough to get rid of the cold heading to my chest.
That's it for that. I made sugar cookies, and ate a ton. I'm making bread right now, and as soon as it's cooled I'm having a few slices. Yummy!!!! I drive tonight and I'm eating pizza. Double yummy!!! I haven't had CHEESE in so long!!!! I'm going to have diet soda, and depending on how much I make tonight, maybe go have a piece of chocolate cake or something sweet and baked delicious badness.
It's my day off. I want to enjoy it guilt free. I'll let the guilt drive me tomorrow.
Cracked
I cracked today. Tonight more like it. I went out with friends after hitting the gym and ended up with a diet Coke, then 2 shots of sour puss and helped them finish off the nachos. Figuring I was already fucking up my GMO free diet, when driving my friend home we hit Burger King and I had a burger, poutine and pop, then hit a donut place after where I proceded to shove 3 donuts in my mouth.
So fucking good.
I'm 148.1lbs. I was 144.8lbs.
I managed 30something days before cracking. But I had a fantastic time at karaoke tonight.
I'm going to bake bread in the morning and stay away from chocolate and junk. I've satisfied a massive craving I've had for ages so I should be able to focus for the last 7 days until my weigh in. By now I just want to be 142 or less.
Hitting the gym tomorrow around noon or 1pm. Do a long day, have a leg day. Eat oatmeal and fresh bread for breakfast, salad for lunch. Drive in the evening, starve for dinner.
I'm not thin yet. I need to get working again.
So fucking good.
I'm 148.1lbs. I was 144.8lbs.
I managed 30something days before cracking. But I had a fantastic time at karaoke tonight.
I'm going to bake bread in the morning and stay away from chocolate and junk. I've satisfied a massive craving I've had for ages so I should be able to focus for the last 7 days until my weigh in. By now I just want to be 142 or less.
Hitting the gym tomorrow around noon or 1pm. Do a long day, have a leg day. Eat oatmeal and fresh bread for breakfast, salad for lunch. Drive in the evening, starve for dinner.
I'm not thin yet. I need to get working again.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Another Shorty
Tired again. Ate too much again. No gym today as my knees and shoulders hurt too much and not in the good 'you worked the muscles hard yesterday' kind of way. More like the 'you didn't have knees lined up properly during the weighted squats yesterday' way.
I ate so much chocolate. Then I had a craving for bread. I ate 4 rolls, a brownie, a chocolate bar... and I think I still will weigh the same if not less tomorrow than I did this morning, which is good considering how much I weigh. 145.9 right now, but I was 145.2 this morning.
Tomorrow is home day :) It's also try to hit the gym day, skip out of work early day, and go with my friends who will be drinking to kareoke day. I said I'd go. I can't eat or drink thanks to the GMO free diet, so I'll probably be bored and tired. I'll also probably end up driving everyones drunk ass home.
I felt like shit this morning but as the day progresses I feel better. I had honey and lemon for a pre bed drink and I'll probably have another before work tomorrow, maybe more at work. My nose is running lots but I don't consider it a cold yet. Just a minor case of the sniffles. If I'm still able to tomorrow I'll hit the gym, skip the 6k run and do light cardio and arms, with legs on Saturday. Weights are easier with a potential cold than running so much.
Food day tomorrow will be heavier in the morning and light in the evening. I don't have any oatmeal besides the horrible plain stuff so I may have the last of the bread for breakfast, just warm it up a bit. Honey and lemon while I get ready, and tea once I'm at work. The usual salad, apple, celery and yogurt for work, with apple or rice cake and tea or coffee for the drive home (probably tea). Hit the gym and a Luna bar with some of the protein smoothie post workout then out with the girls. Saturday will probably be a very light food day, almost like a fast/cleanse day, with Sunday picking up on the veggies again.
I have 7 days to get to 140. I know I can do it, maybe get even lower. NO MORE FUCKING CHOCOLATE. I need to STARVE again. I enjoyed the feeling of being empty last week. I need that again.
I've decided that once I hit 135 I'm going to try to find and buy one of those awesome workout shirts without the back for Zumba. They look awesome and are kinda flowing and not skin tight. I think a black one would look good on me.
I've also decided to shave my head. Not like bic it, just a buzz.... I'm also very excited that Shaun has offered to do it for me :) Tim is jealous lol! Asshole.
I ate so much chocolate. Then I had a craving for bread. I ate 4 rolls, a brownie, a chocolate bar... and I think I still will weigh the same if not less tomorrow than I did this morning, which is good considering how much I weigh. 145.9 right now, but I was 145.2 this morning.
Tomorrow is home day :) It's also try to hit the gym day, skip out of work early day, and go with my friends who will be drinking to kareoke day. I said I'd go. I can't eat or drink thanks to the GMO free diet, so I'll probably be bored and tired. I'll also probably end up driving everyones drunk ass home.
I felt like shit this morning but as the day progresses I feel better. I had honey and lemon for a pre bed drink and I'll probably have another before work tomorrow, maybe more at work. My nose is running lots but I don't consider it a cold yet. Just a minor case of the sniffles. If I'm still able to tomorrow I'll hit the gym, skip the 6k run and do light cardio and arms, with legs on Saturday. Weights are easier with a potential cold than running so much.
Food day tomorrow will be heavier in the morning and light in the evening. I don't have any oatmeal besides the horrible plain stuff so I may have the last of the bread for breakfast, just warm it up a bit. Honey and lemon while I get ready, and tea once I'm at work. The usual salad, apple, celery and yogurt for work, with apple or rice cake and tea or coffee for the drive home (probably tea). Hit the gym and a Luna bar with some of the protein smoothie post workout then out with the girls. Saturday will probably be a very light food day, almost like a fast/cleanse day, with Sunday picking up on the veggies again.
I have 7 days to get to 140. I know I can do it, maybe get even lower. NO MORE FUCKING CHOCOLATE. I need to STARVE again. I enjoyed the feeling of being empty last week. I need that again.
I've decided that once I hit 135 I'm going to try to find and buy one of those awesome workout shirts without the back for Zumba. They look awesome and are kinda flowing and not skin tight. I think a black one would look good on me.
I've also decided to shave my head. Not like bic it, just a buzz.... I'm also very excited that Shaun has offered to do it for me :) Tim is jealous lol! Asshole.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Quick Post
Today was a bit crazy. I'm down to 146.1lbs but I can't find my book that I write it all in. I have hunted and hunted. I know I brought it up here as I wrote in it Tuesday morning. I just can't find it.
Work was ok. I'm being moved again next week which sucks as I love the store I'm in, but it's what I signed up for. I knew there would be some places I'd love and this was one of them, but it's time to experience more things.
I got home and crashed, just so damn tired. Crawled my ass out of bed after a 20min nap and went to the gym. Loved Zumba, not sure how much of the body blast I acually did as it felt kinda easy, and then had to go back to work for a meeting. In that 30min from the gym to work I found out that my friend that I'm living with may have lost her baby (she was about 2 months along) and that my sister is engaged.
I'm flying high, and crashing all at the same time.
Wander, you're so right. I am going to plan a day once a week were I can have a treat. Next week it will be Monday or Tuesday and I will either have a cookie or some chocolate from the Natural food store.
Pre bed note... I was 145.9 before my tea. Thank goodness it's going back down. The next 4 days will be very crucial!!!!
Work was ok. I'm being moved again next week which sucks as I love the store I'm in, but it's what I signed up for. I knew there would be some places I'd love and this was one of them, but it's time to experience more things.
I got home and crashed, just so damn tired. Crawled my ass out of bed after a 20min nap and went to the gym. Loved Zumba, not sure how much of the body blast I acually did as it felt kinda easy, and then had to go back to work for a meeting. In that 30min from the gym to work I found out that my friend that I'm living with may have lost her baby (she was about 2 months along) and that my sister is engaged.
I'm flying high, and crashing all at the same time.
Wander, you're so right. I am going to plan a day once a week were I can have a treat. Next week it will be Monday or Tuesday and I will either have a cookie or some chocolate from the Natural food store.
Pre bed note... I was 145.9 before my tea. Thank goodness it's going back down. The next 4 days will be very crucial!!!!
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Yuck
Last night I could feel the beginning of a sore throat. Today I can feel the sinus pressure, the heavy puffy eyes, the feeling of not being quite right. To top it off my neck really hurts and I don't know if that's due to the weights yesterday or being sick. Plan tonight is to post this, do my post on PT and then hit the hay and get some sleep. I don't have time to be sick.
I was down this morning, thank goodnes, but not by much.147.2 means I dropped a half a pound. I was doing fantastic today until I decided no gym seeing as I felt like shit, and insted was going to go get some GMO free chicken noodle soup.
I got to the Community Food store and the soup they had was a no chicken noodle soup. I needed the chicken part for the potential cold so I decided to get one of those broths in the cardboard containers, add some whole grain pasta, veggies and pepper and make my own cheat 'soup'... then I passed the chocolate section.
I walked out with frozen brocoli, broth, licorice, milk chocolate almond bark, dark chocolate almond bark, raspberry dark chocolate, banana nut loaf (half size) 2 Luna bars and I think that was all. I ate the entire half banana nut loaf, half of each of the almond bark and half the other chocolate bar by the time I got home (fucking rush hour traffic). I then pissed around on the guitar and when my friend and her 2 kids got home I headed upstairs and steamed up some brocoli and made my soup (which was just broth, pasta, pepper and cayenne pepper... maybe too much of the latter). After I had a bowl of cereal and a cup of tea before cutting it off around 8:30pm.
I'm hoping that didn't fuck everything up. Again.
Tomorrow is my crazy day. I get up, go to work, come back home for an hour then hit the gym. Do cardio to warm up, 1 hr of Zumba, 1 hr of body blast (the awesome strenght class that I LOVE) and then after a quick shower at the gym, back to work to teach a class. I won't be home till 11pm so no time to eat.
Plan is coffee and oatmeal for breaky, salad, yogurt, celery and apple for lunch. Rice cake and half a Luna bar for pre gym snack. Other half of a Luna bar after. I may try to hit a booster juice on the way back to the store as I'll need something. I have nothing quick to take with me. Just some more celery or salad, but I think just having a booster juice will serve me well as while it's heavy on sugar (natural) and higher in calories, at least it's liquid and not damn chocolate. With a protein booster, only having half and plenty of water I should be ok. I used to do that all the time on Monday nights back home.
Ugh, I just need to lose this sore throat.
Wander; I think it's just the sugar cravings as I try to cut it out too rapidly. I've overcome it before but having severe issues with willpower this time around. I'm trying agian tomorrow, cutting out chocolate and sweets, but I think I kinda need to go back to having 'treat' days as I'm cracking far too often planning on not having them. Ugh, I think this GMO thing is the problem too. As for Facebook, it's that stupid cityville that's got me going lately. And the absolute need to see whats going on in peoples lives. I'm finding I'm using the messaging more than texting as I can write way more and it's easier to read in one go....
I was down this morning, thank goodnes, but not by much.147.2 means I dropped a half a pound. I was doing fantastic today until I decided no gym seeing as I felt like shit, and insted was going to go get some GMO free chicken noodle soup.
I got to the Community Food store and the soup they had was a no chicken noodle soup. I needed the chicken part for the potential cold so I decided to get one of those broths in the cardboard containers, add some whole grain pasta, veggies and pepper and make my own cheat 'soup'... then I passed the chocolate section.
I walked out with frozen brocoli, broth, licorice, milk chocolate almond bark, dark chocolate almond bark, raspberry dark chocolate, banana nut loaf (half size) 2 Luna bars and I think that was all. I ate the entire half banana nut loaf, half of each of the almond bark and half the other chocolate bar by the time I got home (fucking rush hour traffic). I then pissed around on the guitar and when my friend and her 2 kids got home I headed upstairs and steamed up some brocoli and made my soup (which was just broth, pasta, pepper and cayenne pepper... maybe too much of the latter). After I had a bowl of cereal and a cup of tea before cutting it off around 8:30pm.
I'm hoping that didn't fuck everything up. Again.
Tomorrow is my crazy day. I get up, go to work, come back home for an hour then hit the gym. Do cardio to warm up, 1 hr of Zumba, 1 hr of body blast (the awesome strenght class that I LOVE) and then after a quick shower at the gym, back to work to teach a class. I won't be home till 11pm so no time to eat.
Plan is coffee and oatmeal for breaky, salad, yogurt, celery and apple for lunch. Rice cake and half a Luna bar for pre gym snack. Other half of a Luna bar after. I may try to hit a booster juice on the way back to the store as I'll need something. I have nothing quick to take with me. Just some more celery or salad, but I think just having a booster juice will serve me well as while it's heavy on sugar (natural) and higher in calories, at least it's liquid and not damn chocolate. With a protein booster, only having half and plenty of water I should be ok. I used to do that all the time on Monday nights back home.
Ugh, I just need to lose this sore throat.
Wander; I think it's just the sugar cravings as I try to cut it out too rapidly. I've overcome it before but having severe issues with willpower this time around. I'm trying agian tomorrow, cutting out chocolate and sweets, but I think I kinda need to go back to having 'treat' days as I'm cracking far too often planning on not having them. Ugh, I think this GMO thing is the problem too. As for Facebook, it's that stupid cityville that's got me going lately. And the absolute need to see whats going on in peoples lives. I'm finding I'm using the messaging more than texting as I can write way more and it's easier to read in one go....
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