It felt like a Monday today. I was fat on the scale (143.???? I think?), I was tired at work, I had expired yogurt, I miss my friends, my house, I miss Shaun.... Perhaps the last one was bugging me the most. I miss the stupid chit chat, the laughs. Sad considering it's only been 2 days since I saw him.
Oh yeah, apparently it was a holiday of some sort today? ;p
Yeah, I generally ignore such things, but I did post a valentine as my 365 photo.
After work I hit the gym for Zumba, and some weights. Felt very accomplished and then proceeded to almost have a breakdown in Stupidstore while shopping for yogurt.
I'm just so frustrated and it's so damn stupid. I want a fucking burger. I want pizza. I want all the shit I can't eat on this GMO thing, AND all the stuff I can't eat as I want to be skinny.
Skinny, what I"m not going to accomplish eating the way I am. I've just become so damn concerned about eating GMO free that I'm not paying attention. I've eaten tons of dried fruit today (lots of prunes to help with everything else too!!!) nuts, steamed veggies, chips and salsa, and damn it I bought organic chocolate chips. There's half a bag still in the car.
I have my food for the week, it isn't going to change. However, I do need to pick up more veggies tomorrow as I ate the last today.
I also think the scale is fucked here. There's now way I'm fighting that much and adding that much in a day.
I was 143.5 before I pigged out, so I'm hoping for 144.5 by bed, and 143.5 by morning. Have oatmeal and save the salad until right before my noon meeting. Save the rest until 3pm and hit the gym around 6pm or so. Stay for 2-3hrs and home for veggies and tea. If I can stick to that for at least one day I should be ok.
I need to stop with the chips, chocolate and excessive fruit. I've proven I can do this GMO free thing, now lets take it to the next step. I want 135, I can see it, feel it. I want that feeling of being able to jump up and down on the scale for pure joy.
I've also found the perfect idea for a picture for 365. I can't decide if I'll do it when I hit 130 or 125.... I think we'll see how I look at 130. But that's a goal, something to strive for.
Now lets get to it!!!!!
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Yeah whenever I get on a certain diet kick like no dairy, no sugar, no/light carbs I tend to stop calorie counting and just eat whatever the hell I want, usually back fires on me.
ReplyDeleteFruit is ok, just if you're going to eat lots of it have it for your first meal in the morning, never at night.
Shaun is your trainer right? I kind of fell off the band wagon reading blogs so I'm a bit lost. I didn't know you fell for your trainer!! That'd be tough. :/ I'm currently in a 'mess around' 'hang out 24/7' with a good friend & I find myself missing her after not seeing her for one day..it's annoying & makes me feel pathetic, stupid emotions:(
You know what helps me go down in weight a few pounds? Get piss drunk one night.. I wake up 1-4 pounds lighter and if I don't get the hangover munchies the next day and just eat light then the weight will stay off. It's kind of like a flush for me :/ weird. . lol
Anyways, hope your week gets better!